This Little Light Of Mine?

Recently, we started attending church again for the first time in a very long time.

I did not have an issue with church as a whole.

I just had issues finding a good Sunday School for the kids when they were younger.

Cookies, kool aid and veggie tales just weren't cutting it. 

So, we brought them home to teach them in the word for a while.  

They are a little older now, and we felt it was time to get them out into the world of church and fellowship. 

We have been so blessed to find a location literally 4 minutes from our house. 

This church has an amazing children's program and the church services are amazing!

 Why?!

Because the pastor's at this church are on fire for God! 

The people are on Fire!

I have yet to see a service where there was not a dozen people at the alter by the end of service.

One thing I have also noticed?

 I have never walked away without something smacking me up the side of the head and making me think about it for a good week. 

Most recently he was speaking on having an open faith.

Do you keep it private?

Is it a secret?

Is it out for everyone to see it?

This was a hard service for me. It hit home hard!

Because in the last few years I have been hiding my faith. I have been around some people who I was worried about offending...and in turn when I was hoping to witness to them it dumbed down my faith as a result. Which also effected how my children learned to witness to others. 

When I realized what I had done..I was so hurt and disappointed with myself.  

I felt like I had done something terrible..and I kind of had.

I had hidden my faith and my beliefs for fear of offending people.

When, quite frankly I should be so on fire for the Lord that people who do not believe should not even feel comfortable spending time with me. 

It should ooze out the doors of my van!

Pour out the windows of my house!

It should seep from my pours!

It wasn't.

It was hidden.

Because, I had fallen into the trap of hearing non Christians (Or even Christians) being so negative about  hearing about Jesus..or how hypocritical Christians are. 

I became afraid.

Afraid to step on toes.

Afraid to be judged.

Afraid to offend someone.

Afraid to be viewed as radical.

I have talked to a few people..and it turns out this is not uncommon anymore.

It sickens me to see the err in my ways.

I tried to ignore my mistake for a while and just go on about life. 

I was miserable. 

I saw my children becoming more unhappy.

I saw the mistakes I had made.

So..

After being smacked in the face with it a few times and trying to ignore it..

I fell to my knees and went crawling back to God to beg forgiveness. 

I want to be on Fire!

I want to be sickenly, annoyingly, uncomfortably, contageously, amazingly

on Fire!

It needs to Ooze!

It needs to Pour!

It needs to Seep!

It needs to be uncomfortable for people who do not believe! 

It needs to be annoying and loud and contageous!

It needs to be out in the open!

Because a hidden light dies.

 It suffocates! 

It needs air! 

It needs to breathe!

It should not be a secret!

It should not be private!

It should not be hidden!

So, I am moving forward in my faith. 

But..

I'm going back to how it used to be a few years ago.

It is going to be loud!

It is going to be out there!

I will not be afraid to offend everyone.

What if I shy away from telling someone about Jesus and how wonderful He is...and what if that is the last time that I see that person?

What if they got to be judged and they do not now about him?

About His love? 

About His grace and forgiveness?

What if I miss that opportunity and I go to stand before Him and He asks me why I didn't do more?

Why I didn't 'offend' more people?

Why I didn't ooze, pour and seep my faith?!

Why I didn't shine brighter?

Why I hadn't been on fire? 

 And that, my friends, is not conversation I want to have!

Because it doesn't matter if I 'offend' or put off people for my faith. What matters is if I fulfill what He has planned for me. If that means I will have less names on my 'friends' list, or I get labeled as 'One of THOSE people'...then so be it! 

I will gladly wear my Jesus Freak label with pride.

 

~ Lyndsay

In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.

Matthew 5:16