The Struggle Is Real (Eating Disorder Related Post)

My husband and I have differing views on eating disorders. (Spurred once again by watching an extreme weight loss show)

He says it is easy to lose weight 'just don't eat the cheeseburger/pizza/etc and exercise more.'

While I do agree with the fact that that is true.(I know it is true because I did it and am continuing to do it once again post baby.) ..I also know what it is like on the other side when there is so much more tied to it than that. It is a mental, physical and emotional struggle.

Even with being in 'recovery' it doesn't mean it is gone. Eating disorders don't just go away. You can learn new mentalities, and train yourself to fall back on different options...but there is still that dark little voice that lingers in the background. It gets quieter over time when you ignore it, but can get louder during times of stress or struggle. If you give in and feed the disorder, the voice and urge grows. It is a seriously legitimate mental, physical and emotional struggle.

I guess, I see it differently because I've been on the other side of the fence and I know it is more than just walking away from the cheeseburger and taking a walk..it is so much more. There is a battle that takes place everyday, that no one else can see.

Maybe it is the fact that I'm exhausted from Anna not sleeping well..of the fact that I'm out of coffee..or a plethora of other reasons...and I am forced to remind myself to be on guard about my disorder every single day at the moment.
Does it mean I am not in recovery?
No, it means I'm still fighting and always will. Sure, I have really good times where I get to ignore the fact that it exists, and other times where it comes knocking.

Because it never really goes away.
It never will.

I realize some people will never understand because they have not felt the struggle and the pain.
Guess we can't blame them. They can't understand something they have never experienced. We can't expect that of them. ..and that's ok.

Eating disorders are real people. You don't have to understand them. You just have to accept them and learn to manage them. They do not define you, but if given the chance they will run your life into the ground. And no one knows because it is the biggest secret you will ever have and attempt to keep.

So, the next time you hear someone mention an eating disorder..don't ignore it or brush it under the rug. Just speaking of it is a big deal for most people. It takes a lot to take your biggest struggle and put it out there for others to see.

So..in the spirit of keeping it real..

Hello, my name is Lyndsay and I have an eating disorder and some days...the struggle is real.

Now I am going to take some Tylenol and attempt to get some sleep before this adorable little girl decides to party it up at Lord knows how early! Lol

** I am copy and pasting(typo's and all) this from my FB page. I have and still do struggle with an eating disorder. Sometimes it is very good and sometimes it is very bad. It is what it is. This post was my thought process about it all from late one night, last week...spurred from a conversation I had with my husband about the subject. I love my husband dearly and accept him for who he is. Just like he accepts me for who I am. Along with that, I also realize he (and others) will never understand the struggle that people truly deal with when they have an ED. ** 

Blessings,

Lyndsay